It's been one week and one day HOME

     We brought Maggie back from China one week ago yesterday, and we are continuing to celebrate small milestones...
*Today she read a book and played in her room for the first time. She has been so fearful of that room.
*She has been playing on her own around the house more and more each day.
*She is becoming more relaxed when we are around "strangers" (although it is a good thing that she is attached to us)
*She SAT in the bathtub the other day for 5 minutes without crying. : ) We were having to have one of us hold her standing, while the other washed.
*She does fine with her car seat.
*She can give "high 5," blow kisses and give kisses.
*She learned what ketchup is today, and how good it is with CFA fries. : )

     There are so many new things for her. She felt the wind in her hair the other day and would take a deep breath in and giggle, while moving her hands through her hair. So sweet.
     When she sees her stroller she wants out of our arms and in that seat. She knows we are going somewhere!

On a medical note: We took her to the neurosurgeon in regards to her hydrocephalus and dw malformation (cyst at the base of her brain stem). She has what they call "massive hydrocephalus". She has about 3x the fluid on her brain that she should. It is his opinion that she will need two shunts to drain the fluid. One at the top of her skull and one lower. Those will drain the fluid and relieve pressure on her brain. However, our first step is to have an eye appointment on 4/3 to see if the eye doc can figure out how much pressure is on her brain; if not, she will have an MRI before placing the shunts. We will keep everyone updated.
     Matt and I have a peace about it all. Thank you for all the prayers and support!

This one is reality mixed with joy

     I want to be a testimony to the greatness of my God. I want to be known as a woman who is in love with Jesus, but not to appear as a Jesus freak; never really thought it accomplished much to cram Jesus down peoples throats, or to be so heavenly minded that I miss the reality of everyday life. I just want to be a real human being, with needs and desires like everyone else, but in the midst of that understands my need for a Savior.
     Does anyone wonder where I am going with this? On a blog, which was created for bringing home our third kiddo? I will let you know...
     We brought Maggie home 6 days ago. She has done AMAZINGLY well with the adjustment. She is a JOY for sure! And yet, in the midst of the joy, I find myself with selfish thoughts. I am quickly remembering what it is to have a two year old. How that little one wants constant attention. She doesn't care that I haven't folded the laundry done yesterday, or that I need to empty the dishwasher, or need to look at our budget, or just pick up around the house so my mind doesn't go insane, or that I still have winter decor around that needs replacing.
     My mind is so full of me, even in the midst of a new child! Never fear though, I have given the honest thoughts to Jesus. Asked Him to touch me, breathe over me, speak over me; whatever He chooses. I need it.
     So, Jesus reminded me how much in love with me He is. Within 5 minutes of journaling those thoughts above, a good friend from Indiana called me. She has two adopted children so she understands our journey. She told me my thoughts are completely normal. I have to adjust too, just like with any newborn! Imagine that! She said that Maggie is biologically 2, but within our family she is a 2 week old. What does a 2 week old do/need? To be held, comforted...a lot!
     Jesus used that for my heart and mind. I am so very thankful.
     Then I listed to this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q-ZtKzw-ipo&feature=related
     Such a great reminder to my soul...the greatness of our God. So beyond me. I like that. I need that.
   

Crazy, but Good, Weekend

     Maggie has had many 'firsts' these first days home. The main one being Levine's Children's Hospital. Saturday morning she took a tumble down about 10 stairs. She was crying at the bottom but seemed a little spacey. Because we had yet to check into her "hydrocephalus" we were told to take her in, just to be safe. Well, it ended up being a blessing because we were able to get quick results of her CT Scan.

     We found out that she officially has hydrocephalus (fluid on the brain) as well as a Dandy Walker malformation around her spinal cord (basically a cyst at the brain stem). So, today we will be calling to get an appointment with a neurosurgeon.

     Through that whole time at the hospital Matt and I felt the amazing peace of our God. The spirit of God will never cease to amaze me! 

     On a less stressful note, we took Maggie to the park and she loved it! So much giggling! She also tried out our trampoline for the first time, which she also loved!

     She seems to know home already. Our biggest hurdles right now are creating a nap and night time routine and her learning that I cannot carry her EVERYWHERE around the house. Not too bad if you ask me.

     

Modeling their 'silks'

 Fun with a dome thing

 Reading with Nonna

 Sharing her pear with Natalie

 Crashing on daddy

 First time on the trampoline

HOME, oh so sweet, HOME

     Our flights home yesterday went really well. Although Maggie only slept about 4 hours during that 17 hours, which resulted in a not so good night of sleep at home. She was awake crying every 2-3 hours. I told Matt it felt like having a newborn. It was surprise though b/c she slept so well in our hotels. Oh well, this too shall pass, as my mom always said.    
     She woke up happy and this first full day back home has been GOOD. Maggie has adjusted so well to her new life. We marvel at how quickly she connected with me (from day 1). And she gets so excited when Matt, Natalie or Jaydn enter the room!
     Maggie giggles A LOT. What a blessing and an answer to our prayers! Most of the pictures we received before hand were of a solemn little lady. And three caregivers at the orphanage described her the same..."timid." So, to hear her giggle so often is a joy.
     There are two things she is working through at home - 1) Our living room ceiling fan. She looks up, whimpers and starts scooting out of the room. Too funny! 2) Her room. It has her crib in it and she does not like to be told it's time for bed. So, in turn, she doesn't want to play with the toys in there at all. haha

 One of my favorite things she does.

  Hugging her big brother

  At the airport

Some friends put this in our front yard! (Maggie Mei - Welcomed into our arms 3/6/2012

 Eating Cheerios with big sis.

 So happy!

 Looking out the window. (don't write me up for Jaydn's skiveys!!! haha)

   
   

Ready

     Today we went to The Safari Park, which was a fabulous zoo! Maggie wasn't really impressed, but enjoyed being outside. She fell asleep as soon as we were in the van on the way back to the hotel and, thankfully slept for over 2 hours!
     Now we are just hanging out in the room while Matt runs to the grocery for a few items. She is wandering the room, making her way back to me every 2 to 3 minutes, just to be picked up and given a hug. Then she is off again. So sweet.
     I keep wondering if her caretakers saw the sides of her that we are already seeing. She loves to tease. And the faces, she will turn her head and turn just her eyes back to you, real sly. She is very quick to give a smile if she trusts you.
     She found Matt's sunglasses, so I put them on to show her. She wasn't real sure about that but made her way back to them and wanted me to put them on again. When I did, she immediately got off my lap, scared. Such a simple thing and yet something she had never seen.

  First time brushing her teeth

  Eating cheerios with her chopsticks

 Random cuteness

     I have a confession to make. I am ready to come home. I am ready to not be stared at for being an American with an Asian child. I am ready to have American food that I know. I am ready to hug my kids back home and have my own coffee.
     I was telling Maggie about home today. As soon as I said the word 'home' to her tears filled my eyes. Even the word reminded me that we still have three days. Don't get me wrong, this has been a wonderful journey, it's just a long time to be away from what is known. I am ready for routine and friends. So thankful that we have a huge support system waiting to meet us along this leg of the journey.
 

We are smitten!

     It is Saturday night here. Maggie is sleeping and we are relaxing. We are now in Guangzhou, where the American Consulate is. Maggie had her medical appointment today. Very basic check-up. She hated it. We told her this was a piece of cake next to what doctor appointments she has coming up back home.  : (
     This province has been my favorite stop so far! It is just unbelievable how many people live in China. Everywhere you look there are apartment buildings!
     Our hotel is unbelievable! S-W-A-N-K-Y! We have a "living area" with a flat screen and then our bedroom, with a flat screen, and the "walk-in" shower/bath area with a speaker so you can hear the tv. We are spoiled.
     So many adoptive families here, it's very cool to see. Our guides have been so appreciative to the families, for giving these kids a home. It is pretty humbling.

     Maggie is doing great! I can't believe we have only had her for four days! Already we have seen so much progress! Small things, but big when you think of where she has come from! 

                             

                                              

     The first day she cried, well let me rephrase that - SCREAMED, when we took her clothes off; even just her shoes or coat. Today, not even an issue. She will begin to take her coat off once we are in the room. And she will now go barefoot!
     She is walking more and more on her own, each day. We don't think she was given much chance to practice. She is steady, just not real quick. I have a feeling that once we are home she will be running in no time! Especially once she starts playing with Braxtyn (my bff's little guy)!
     One of my favorite moments of the day was when I gave her her toothbrush for the first time. She took it, grinned from ear to ear and then started brushing her hair, so proud of herself!

 

     We are realizing that she is a very happy, playful and strong-willed little girl! She knows how to throw a fit, flirt with her daddy and melt our hearts with her giggle and many faces! We are in love with her!

Joy, joy and more JOY

     This little gal has done FABULOUS adjusting to us! What a HUGE answer to prayer! These pics were from today, just hanging out with daddy. She is comfortable with both of us, which is such a blessing. If she is unsure at all, she wants me, but otherwise either is fine.

     We took a bullet train today (180mph) to her orphanage. On the way Maggie was happy. That is until our guide told her that we were going to see her caregivers; she then became sad...cried and little and laid her head on my shoulder for awhile. She completely understood what Jin told her. Amazing. 

     Once there, she cried in the first room, but once she realized that we were not leaving her she was fine. She even went to 2 caregivers and the pediatrician! And then came right back to us!

I would like to write more but it is 9p here and Maggie will not lay down to sleep until lights are fully off and we are sleeping. : ) So, I will write more later. 

It's official - Maggie Mei is now a Barcalow!!

     Maggie Mei Barcalow. It's got a good sound to it, doesn't it? Today we went to the Civil Affairs office and signed the official form saying we want her forever! The pic above is of her sitting with Matt, Face-Timing with Natalie, Jaydn and Nonna (Mum Barcalow). She was so happy listening to them; she gave them a lot of smiles!
     Most of the day yesterday was spent in my lap, watching Matt. Today, she reached for him, allowed him to hold her and is, as I write, sleeping with her head on his chest, holding his hand. Such a blessing. That is our prayer answered today, that she would be open to her daddy.

 This is Ms. Tang, the orphanage director that took care of Maggie. This was a bittersweet day for her. Maggie went to her, but wanted to come right back to me. Needless to say, that made my heart happy. Often times, when we pick her up, she giggles; just so happy!

This is the ride back to the hotel, after signing the papers. The amazing thing is that when we got in the van this A.M. to go to the Civil Affairs office, Maggie started to wimper. So our guide (Jin, who is WONDERFUL) spoke to her in Chinese. Maggie smiled, giggled and the whimpering stopped. I asked Jin what she told her...she said "that she is just going to say goodbye to Ms. Tang, she isn't staying. She would be staying with her momma and baba (daddy)." Amazing! Yet another blessing from our God.

Some of you are not on Facebook, so I will show a few pics from yesterday... This was Gotcha Day.

Tomorrow we will visit her orphanage. We are looking forward to taking pictures for waiting families, like so many did for us! 

Thank you for the continued prayers, our God hears them!

 

Gotcha Day!

     As I type, Maggie Mei is sleeping. Such a sweet sound (and sight).
     This morning we were both nervous and excited. Especially once we were at the Civil Affairs building. We were there about a 1/2 hr early so we had nothing to do but wait. Matt did fine just sitting, but I had to be up, watching out the window. After watching for awhile with no sight of her, I finally sat. Within a few minutes another guide looked out the window and said, "there they are!" (There were three adoptions from Maggie's orphanage this A.M.) With that, we were up, camera's ready. I snapped one of her coming in and then put the camera down and took her from the orphanage director.

     She is perfect. We do think she has some swelling in her head, although Ms. Tang (orphanage director) said that she is clear of fluid in her brain. We are not worried though. Ms. Tang told us that Maggie understands everything. She is very smart. And we have already found out, very cautious.
     When I took her she let out a little cry but once I gave her a drink and cheerios she was ok. Soon Matt took her and she cried a little again, but soon quieted. She was too funny with the cheerios. She wouldn't take them herself, so we put them in her mouth. So, when she wanted more she would just drop her head towards the container.
     While I asked Ms. Tang questions about Maggie's routine, Matt was around the corner with Maggie. When done, I came around the corner and Maggie reached out to me!!! and smiled!!! Highlight of the morning for this momma! Although, I have to say, Matt got the first smile from her! And he is claiming that one!!
     Once back in the hotel she did not want down; just wanted to be held. I tried to put her down, to hold her hand and walk, but she just backed up into me and wouldn't move. We went back to the room and within 20 minutes she was asleep in my arms. : )
     The orphanage has her so nicely dressed and I was surprised because she only has two layers on. I was expecting 3-4. : ) Once she is awake, I will see if any of the clothes we brought fit her, and if not, donate them to the orphanage.
     I appear to be the "favored parent" at this point, and Matt says he is glad b/c my heart would have had a really hard time. I love that man!
     So many of you have been leaving us messages. As from the beginning of this journey, God has us so covered, it is amazing. Thank you, we are so very grateful!

This one's from Matt...

Our day started off like every other day so far. We woke up, ate breakfast and met our translator who showed us some amazing parts of the Chinese culture. But about halfway through the day, everything changed for me. We were going through how the next three days will go and it suddenly hit me: we were within 24 hours of meeting Maggie and then taking her with us!

This entire journey has been wildly exciting and amazing for both Shari and I. But the last few hours have been, well, to be honest, scary. I told Shari that this feels exactly like it did when we were sitting outside the hospital with Natalie sitting in our backseat, waiting for us to take her home for the first time. It’s scary! God has entrusted us with another one of his prized creations but this one already has two years of history. He is trusting me with her health, her upbringing, her spiritual direction, her LIFE! This is not something to be taken lightly.

All Maggie has known these first two years of her life are the four walls of her orphanage and the 3-4 women who have raised her. She doesn’t recognize Shari’s voice from being in her womb for nine months. She doesn’t know us. She doesn’t even speak the same language! And now it is Shari and I’s job to help her transition through the fear and confusion that she will be feeling over the next several days (and possibly weeks) and her world takes a radical turn, albeit for the better.

And so, it is in this time of fear/worry that I turn to the passage I quote to Jaydn every time he is afraid: Joshua 1:9. “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go.”

So am I nervous? Yes. But I am also excited. God is the one who started us on this journey and is the one who has taken us this far. And I have complete confidence that He will see us through this phase of our journey as well!

Now at our 2nd stop - Nanjing

     We flew into Nanjing today, the capitol of Maggie's province. It is a smaller city than Beijing, but just as crowded. Matt and I discussed how we both thought of China only as we see it in kungfu movies. Small cities in the midst of mountain scapes (Beijing has 20 million people & Nanjing has 8 million). Haha!
     Our hotel is beautiful! The lobby has a coy pond and a piano player.
     We LOVE our guide here in Nanjing. She took us to a small grocery store to pick up some water. While there we picked out some potato chips...flavors? Numb (no, that's not a misprint) and spicy hot pot flavor pringles AND Hot and Sour Fish soup LAYS (only Matt will be trying those).  I picked up one can, thinking it was sour cream and onion, just going by the coloring of the can. Thankfully I asked our guide if that was truly the flavor...glad I asked! It was actually seaweed flavor!! Aaagghh!
     Our plans for the week have shifted quite a bit. Tomorrow (Monday) was supposed to be 'gotcha day' but a meeting came up or something for the different agencies/offices and no one can get their kids tomorrow. SO, we will get Maggie Tuesday afternoon (around 1AM in the states). Our guide told us that Maggie has never been outside. Kids younger than 2 do not go out b/c 1-2 caretakers care for 15 babies. It would be very hard for them to watch that many. So, our sweet girl has a huge change coming for her. We covet your prayers for her.
     Well, I leave you tonight thankful... 1) for free Wi-Fi in our hotel room (first hotel was $10/day); 2) 3 english speaking tv channels; 3) English on a restaurant menu. 4) a crib in our room set up for Maggie (makes it more real)

Matt's thoughts & the Great Wall!!

February 29

Matt put this together, in flight...

     It's currently 6:30 pm and we've traveled almost 2500 miles already. We still have 9 hours to go and are flying at an altitude of 34000 feet. We are presently north of canada with an outside air temp of -64F! The lowest its been so far was -82F!!!  So far I've watched two movies and Shari's on her third. (She cheats though because she only watches the scenes she wants and forwards through the other parts) :)

     The morning was a blur. We had a great morning getting the kids off to school and then headed to the airport. Check in was a little rough but mostly fine. The flight to DC was uneventful until we realized that we had experienced a weather delay and were landing with only 40 minutes before our connecting flight took off! We had to run to the complete other end of the terminal but made it on time thankfully.

     Everything seemed to be going well until the pilot came over the speakers and told us they were having difficulties with some immunization equipment. We finally backed out of our gate and headed towards the runway where the plane stopped and we were again told there were some problems and that we would be waiting for another bit of time. Long story short we took off two hours late and should be arriving around 5:30 instead of 3:30.

 Notice the temp.

     Shari and I keep saying how excited we are and how we can't believe the day is finally here! Surreal is the only word I can think of when I think about how I feel. I'm sitting in an airplane on my way to a country I've never been to meet a little girl I've never met and bring her home to be my daughter. A year ago I would have never believed you if you would have told me I would be doing this.

     I'm so excited to see China and meet its people. It's funny because Shari and I are definitely the minority on this flight!  I'm thankful that God has trusted us with this opportunity and we hope to be a faithful steward of it all. That's it for right now. I'll write more later.

March 2

The Great Wall

     I couldn't tell you exactly what I expected of the Great Wall, but it wasn't snow. It made the wall pretty, but the steps terrible! 

     Matt made it farther up than I did. I waited for him and took others pictures, some of myself, and attempted to talk to a security guard who asked me questions about the snow and showed me coins he had. I'm not real sure what he was telling me. : ) Unfortunately for Matt though, I stepped into a souvenir shop during the time that he was coming back to get me. The poor guy walked all the way to the bottom assuming I had just started down without him. When he got to the bottom, he found out I was still at the same place and he had to come back up for me!  Oh well, at least he got his exercise for the day. :)

     Some Chinese people saw us and wanted their picture taken with them. Too funny! So, I gave them our camera as well. 

     Beijing is crowded; I have never seen so many cars. People do not have the right of way here, I thought our driver was going to hit several! And the way people merge here is crazy!

     Tomorrow we will visit the Forbidden City. We were also told that we will get Maggie on Tuesday now, instead of Monday. Our guide said the change is because of bureaucracy. While our hearts are sad, I know God has a reason for this and we will continue to trust Him through it!